Abarbanel on the Parsha

For the week ending 2 March 2024 / 22 Adar Alef 5784

Birkat Hamazon: Blueprint of Jewish Destiny (Part 15)

by Rabbi Reuven Lauffer
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“Anyone who recites Birkat HaMazon is blessed through it.”

(Zohar HaKadosh to ParshatTerumah)

The next request reads: “The Compassionate One, may He sustain us in honor.”

We ask Hashem to sustain us with honor. What is honor? Perhaps the most basic definition is that we are respected by those around us. But, as with all things that are related to Judaism, it is much deeper than simply whether we are admired or not.

The mishna in Pirkei Avot (4:1) quotes Ben Zoma, who asks four rhetorical questions. The last one is, “Who is honored?” As with the preceding three questions, Ben Zoma then answers with a completely unexpected observation: “Who is honored? He who honors others.” He is offering a piece of advice to all those who would like to be honored. The most direct and effective path to honor is by honoring others.

The Torah relates that when Eisav came back from his hunting expedition to find food for his father, “Vayavoi l’aviv – and he came to his father” (Ber. 27:31). The Rabbis point out that these words in Lashon HaKodesh can be read forwards and backwards, a type of palindrome. This teaches us that if one honors their father and mother, they will be rewarded with their children honoring them. As Rabbi Yitzchak Abarbanel (1437-1508) writes about Ben Zoma’s thought-provoking insight, a person can only give another what they, themselves, possess. Only someone honorable can give honor to others.

The Midrash, Tana d’Bei Eliyahu, cites Hashem declaring to the Jewish nation, “My beloved children, is there anything that I lack that I should have to ask from you? All I ask is that you love one another, honor one another and respect one another. In this way, no sin, robbery or base deed will be found among you, so that you will remain pure forever.”

One of the foremost disciples of Rabbi Yisrael Salanter, Rabbi Yitzchak Blazer and Rabbi Simcha Zisel Ziv, who were the founding giants of the Mussar movement, was Rabbi Yosef Yoizel Horwitz (1847-1919). He established the famed Yeshiva in Novardok, which turned into a network of Yeshivahs all over Eastern Europe. Similar to the Alter of Kelm, he became known as the Alter of Nevardok. In teaching what the concept of honor really means, he would tell a story about a blacksmith who worked from morning to night in extreme heat and dust. One day, a friend of his asked him why he hadn’t chosen an easier profession. With his talents, he could easily have been an enormously successful goldsmith. The blacksmith burst out laughing and told his friend that if he would have been a goldsmith, he would have died of starvation a long time ago. “You know why?” he told his friend. “Because, in all the years that I have been in business, no one has ever asked me to fix a golden object. Iron, yes. All the time. But never gold!”

“You are a complete fool!” retorted the friend. “Who, in their right mind would come and ask you to make, or fix for them jewelry? If you had a goldsmith’s workplace and you advertised effectively, you could have earned your income in a much more honorable way!”

The Alter explains, “Aren’t we the same? We think and act as if our income is completely dependent upon ourselves. So much so, that very often we have an unfortunate habit of taking Hashem out of the equation. Perhaps, if we would rely on Hashem more, and on ourselves less, we would be able to earn our living in a more honorable way.”

This is why, after each meal that includes bread, we ask Hashem to sustain us with honor. We turn to our Father in Heaven and “remind” ourselves of the real source of our livelihood.

To be continued…

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